School Science Fairs Be Like
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the school science fair probably the
most memorable time during school on the
same level as getting caught cheating
and failing a test because this is the
first time as a kid you get to
experience the crushing weight of stress
so for the people that don’t know a
science fair is a school event where
students come up with scientific ideas
and theories to show off to other kids
but what I left off was the amount of
work you have yes have to do so first
you have to write a hypo a hypo a hypoth
hypo so first you have to write this
which by definition is an educated guess
or prediction about the relation sh
between two variables that can be tested
to see if it’s true but the real
definition may as well be you are about
to make a guess and if you guess wrong
[ __ ] you are about to look so dumb
because you can’t just write down I feel
like this is going to happen or I think
this is going to happen you write it
down like you know what going to happen
on my mother’s life my dogs kids and my
best friend soul my statement that I did
no research on and it’s just an educated
guest is right and then you WR at your
conclusion now this is the part where
you end up doing the project and this is
where the stress hits you because for
some reason you lose points for guessing
think wrong and to add more stress they
made it a competition meaning if you get
first second or third your middle school
social status cool points went up so
every kid was super competitive and try
Harding and how it worked was you have
to score the top three highest in your
classroom then you advance to the
cafeteria where everyone in the grade
competes for first place with a grand
prize of free domino cinnamon sticks and
to a kid that is basically a million
dollars and as y’all can probably guess
my salty never got top three nothing
ever I don’t even think I got a grade of
a 75 on any of my science projects and
honestly it’s not my fault the
competition is too high for starters
there that one guy that just always
makes a solar system every year there is
always one guy that makes a solar system
then there’s that one guy that just make
something super cool like a snow conone
machine or a robot and then there’s no
science paperwork no thesis no
hypothesis no conclusion just a [ __ ]
and a robot yo bro you made this yeah is
it cool yeah bro it’s crazy what what
was your experiment pardon experiment
yeah like your thesis your hypothesis
your conclusion your science stuff I
just made a robot bro wait but but but
you won first place I know right I
didn’t have to try bro if I’m being
honest I didn’t even know this a science
class I didn’t bring a thesis in the
eyebr I just built a robot this was so
easy I even try bro keep it a secret I
bought this from Walmart last night but
guess what I’m be eating that Domino
cinnamon stick I know that’s right then
there’s that one kid who obviously
didn’t even make their project like
they’ll have freshly chopped wood from a
wood cutter as their poster board they
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